Yaadein...jo sataye!

Teri yaad jab jab sataye....
Yeh dil rukh rukh kar ro leta hai...

In vaadiyon mein teri khusboo mehek rahi hai...
Dil ko chu kar dard de ja rahi hai...

Hum duur us nav ko dekh rahe hai...
Jo dhere dhere lehro mein kho rahi hai...

Jaane waleko humari kadar nahi...
Hum hai ki unki aas lagaye bhetain hain....

Chupke se hava ka zhoka aap ki yaad dila jay...
Yeh dil rukh rukh kar ro leta hai...


My first attempt at Hindi... :

REgards,
Zooom..!!

 

ZOOM..ab hindi mein:grin:
reminds me of those poems..in those hindi movies wehre the hero/heroine is at a scenic location, taking a walk or jsut standing..thing about lost love......
where were u when u wrote this
nice tho....warm....
keep em coming

 

Hmm.. not bad for a first attempt... its pretty good !!
The only thing dat troubled me was..... in between it lost its flow... both in rhythm and emotions...
I may be wrong.. but ... good going !!
Should i say welcome to the hindi club :beer:

 

Man .. Wat an Imagination !! .. Vaadiyon mein the .. phir seedhe Samundar kinaare .. nav ko dekhne .. : .. (kiddin) .. anyway .. nice lines .. I always believe a poem should be judged not be da rules but by da feelins behind them .. great first attempt

 

I agree with notty....But i wasnt saying anything abt rules....i just said wat i felt... Anyways i did say... It is GOOD !!

 

Hey .. Knight_ki_gf .. i wasn't commentin in reply to u .. infact i thought i'm da first one replyin to this thread .. but by da time i type n post .. DOC n U had it before me .. so .. i had not even read ur post wen i had posted mine ... Chill .. :beer:

 

good one zoom!!!
:beer:

 

your good at hindi .
u jus dont know it

i like the poem
says a lot..more than the words given..

 

@doc: I was in my flat... room darkly lit... few smokes flying... & love songs on the track

@knight_ki_gf: Yup.. i agree.. it isnt smooth or having a rthym... I never look out for rthym...but just write whatever i feel or comes out...

@notty_lad: Sahi imagination hai ki nahi bava?? Well... i remember my one conversation with my english teacher in 7th std... where i was arguing with here regarding a illogical stanza by the great poet Alferd Tennyson...and she said: Never think about a poem logically...else it wont be a poem
Similarly.. my favourite poet, John Keats's poem 'Words'...wherein he depicted how meaningless are words...if we stop giving them importance n dont treat there meaning in actual sense...and he told all this in simple plain WORDS....

@ansh: Thanks for the feedback

@martina: You know me... dont u?

REgards,
Zooom..!!

 

rythm

rythm or no rythm just keep writing not bad yaar i guess its better than most of what i read these days

 

waah waah zoom...

aaki agli kavita ka madhur sur kab kaano mein gunje ga

 

Zoom....ther u go zooming again

or ab toh Hindi me bhi...gr8 going

&yeah, one thng I noticed here....i might b wrong...this is the first poem(among ur poems that i hv read) where u hv replied to the posts.....good to see that ....keep replying

 

Zoom bro...awsome job
nice poetry (SAMAJH A GAI MUJHEY) lol
keep it up

 

hey zoom.. sorry to reply you late..
but this is a very good thing u wrote in d hindi...
if u wudnt have mentioned..its ur first time to try hindi.. no-one wud have guessed that..

(do minute ke liye mujhe lagaa ke tumne kahi se churayi hai ye poem... fir socha.. wo ladkaa jo mess ke khaane se bore hota hai.. IGT ka roz boz uthata hai.. online mehfil ko roshan kartaa hai.. mere jaise logon ko din-raat zeltaa hai.. usse aisi chize karne ke liye time kaise milaa hoga?? so poem be yours only...)

 

@write2madhur: Thanks buddy...

@amit82cse: The next time... i feel something about

@Garima: Yup you are right... i forgot to follow up the poem..once i post it! Next time onwards i would keep in mind to reply

@faiqrock: Good...u understood that

@nimisha: No probs dear... Thanks for encouragement...
Aap jaise logon se feedback milta hai to acha lagta hai...

REgards,
Zooom..!!

 

STOPPPPPPP lissenin to pop! :annoyed:



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