Why is it??

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by rocker_vish, May 20, 2007.

  1. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    Well mates....WHY IS IT???thats the question alwayz in our mind...somethin things happen ...but we dont know why...!!!and question in our mind is WHY IS IT??? so.....

    WHY IS IT??

    Why is it??that,
    I always tell myself that, i dont miss her,
    But whenever i think about her,
    I realize that she is the only person,
    I had been waitin 4!!

    Why is it that,
    I always tell myself that , i dont care for her,
    But whenever i see tears rollin out of her eyes,
    My heart cries for her!!!

    Why is it,
    I get angry on her and tell myself that
    ill never talk to her.
    But whenever i see her smiling face,
    It gives me inner pleasure and i start talkin to her!!

    Why is it,
    I alwayz tell myself that,
    She doesnt make any difference to me,
    But still i cant sleep whole night,
    Only thinkin about her!!!

    WHY IS IT??

    I looked deep inside my heart
    I asked myself,
    Is it cuz i still love her??
    And answer i got is YES!!!

    She is locked in a corner of my heart,
    And i have thrown the key in a deep ocean,
    So this lock could never be opened.
    And i could love her till d last day of my life..!!!!

    -Vishal .C. Bhindora
  2. CrYpTiC_angel

    CrYpTiC_angel Rebelle!

    Too many "that"s. Sounds like a girl wrote it, not that that's a bad thing.
  3. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    ok now?? :D
  4. nimisha

    nimisha .:Forum Leader:.

    liked it....
  5. ~Bish

    ~Bish The Illusionist

    liked it buddy.. i feel words r ingredients of a poem.. whether u use "that" or not doesn't matter for me.. becoz the base of a poem is the emotion the feel which u want to bring out.. n u hv done a gud job..
  6. CrYpTiC_angel

    CrYpTiC_angel Rebelle!

    I just realised why I felt there were too many "that"s.

    It's all about punctuation!

    Now that's better.

    Even ignoring it, the poem is just OK for me.
  7. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    lolzz...y u worrying abt the punctuation.....i dont want 2 win ne competition or something....this is what i felt....this is what i wrote....

    no offence mate...
  8. CrYpTiC_angel

    CrYpTiC_angel Rebelle!

    Well, little things like punctuation can help you express yourself better so you dont really have to edit this poem but you sure can keep it in mind, can't you, when you write your next one? And about "writing what you feel" and not editing the poem, I think that applies to maybe the words that you use or the idea that you put across. I can say this, coz I myself used to write.

    You should always be open to editing out any wrong grammar or editing the punctuation to make it better.
  9. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    ok meri maa samaj gaya!!!!!!! newayz ru a gemini...u arguing like 1....:p
  10. ~Bish

    ~Bish The Illusionist

    cryptu is very gud in arguments.. don't take panga wid her.. i wud love to have a duel wid her someday..
  11. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    ya u guyz should :sdt: ;)
  12. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    first thing who says geminis argue ..!
    secondly i have read sooooooo many iof this kind taht i feel its just another one ...same old symptoms of kicked out in love !

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