Thy Beauty Beauty – a spread out rose, resembling a flame, Shines bright upon, me today, Just as bright, as a flame; She – with a light, to halt this night, She beams and gleams her beauty pleasing the eye, just so bright. So the bird of love, requests to fly, Just so high to see your smile, Behind that beauty a person resides, Just so sweet, for me to call mine.
well, the poem is good...but personally, i think the use of comma was abundant than sufficient.......it's just making the poem to pause more than it needs........
@guitarangela - i know what you mean, but for some reason i wanted it to be slow with pauses. I don't know, I just find it good the way it is. Thanx for the input though. And thanx everyone else for the encouraging comments.
