the Stupidest people to ever dial 911!!

Discussion in 'The ChitChat Lounge' started by slashboyin, May 25, 2006.

  1. slashboyin

    slashboyin New Member

    Here they are folks,

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?

    Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from

    the brown house on the corner.

    Dispatcher: Do you have an address?

    Caller: No, I'm wearing a blouse and slacks, why?

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?

    Caller: Someone broke into my house and took

    a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich.

    Dispatcher: Excuse me?

    Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table

    and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.

    Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?

    Caller: No, but this has happened to me before

    and I'm sick and tired of it.

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?

    Caller: Hi, is this the Police?

    Dispatcher: This is 9-1-1. Do you need police assistance?

    Caller: Well, I don't know who to call.

    Can you tell me how to cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before.

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 Fire or emergency?

    Caller: Fire, I guess.

    Dispatcher: How can I help you sir?

    Caller: I was wondering.....does the fire department put snow chains on
    their trucks?

    Dispatcher: Yes sir, do you have an emergency?

    Caller: Well, I've spent the last 4 hours trying to put these chains on my

    and... well.. do you think the fire department could

    come over and help me?

    Dispatcher: Help you what?

    Caller: Help me get these &*%$ chains on my car!

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?

    Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven

    but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.

    Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.

    Caller: I thought you just sai d it was nine-one-one.

    Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.

    Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?

    Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.

    Dispatcher: Is this her first child?

    Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

    And the winner is..........

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1

    Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing.

    I'm all out of breath.

    Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.

    Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?

    Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.

    Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?

    Caller: No

    Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?

    Caller: Running from the Police.
    jocelyn likes this.
  2. .:SpY_GaMe:.

    .:SpY_GaMe:. New Member

    there is a thread called the pj thread where we post such jokes next time add it there

    already read sth such b4 but still made me laugh
  3. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    but never mind..i had a good laugh..the best one was how to cook turkey..lolol
  4. jocelyn

    jocelyn New Member

    I liked the last one and the Ham sandwich one the best... :0

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