The Only wish

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by idefixe, Apr 4, 2006.

  1. idefixe

    idefixe New Member

    Its a kind of a cliqued theme...............and this was one of my first ones
    So pple tell me if u like it....

    Sometimes I wish sometimes I hope,
    That this world would change,
    For improvement there is scope.
    And for this world to live as one
    Friendship is the rope.

    I wish there was no hatred
    And only there was peace.
    I wish there were no countries
    And there were no boundaries
    And no piece of land that we’d fight for,
    This earth is a gift to us
    For which we must thank the might for.

    I wish there was no religion
    And killing in the name of it
    And there was no racism of caste and creed
    I wish people were real, not fakes
    Just look at the mess all this fallacy makes.
    To compete this material world life’s become so racy
    I wish one day there’ll be an end to hypocrisy.

    Methinks. And if every one of us thinks so
    One day there’ll be a world we hoped for.
    Filled with love and brotherly bliss,
    If we really vouch for it.
    So come on you people bring out your heart.
    To make this world a better place
    All of us can play a part.
    BubblyMartini likes this.
  2. Sharmontime

    Sharmontime New Member

    Sure Bro...i concur.
    Very well the concept.
    It could have been better, though this conveys the message aptly.
    There now arises, if it's necessay to put better or convey better.
    Whatever, I liked it.:)
  3. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM

    Hail ! Guru of Peace ;)
    i liked this one Bhaskar...i take the liberty of calling you that
    idefixe reminds me of quickfix - (no offence meant).. err.. is it related to Asterix in anwy ?

    getting back to the topic
    i liked the poem
    even the title is apt..

    thinking of this poem only two words come to mind..
    "if only..."
  4. walk_alone

    walk_alone **~~| An Atheist |~~**

    Dude theme is gud title is thoughful but certainly lacks flow.
    cd have reworked but must say quite nice for unedited version.
  5. idefixe

    idefixe New Member

    All the citic and appreciation is welcome...............!
    @sharmontime....thanx for ur comments,but i never wanted to change the fisrst was all at 1 go

    Hey thanx bubbly........tired of calling u that (feels, if i can only know ur name ;)

    And yaa my nic...........idefixe is somethin as fixated 2 ur ideal course..anyways u can call me by name.........and yaa u can help me with some reps

    and thanx walkalone...............ill take ur comments
  6. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM

    its Martina....u can call me that
    dont ask me if its my pseudonym..its not;)
  7. nimisha

    nimisha .:Forum Leader:.

    ya.. there is scope..that world could be better place..
    n there is scope..that this poem cud have been more effective wit just some more efforts..

    but....good job..

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