Right speak u english!!!

Discussion in 'The ChitChat Lounge' started by akkyy21, Dec 27, 2005.

  1. akkyy21

    akkyy21 #%@!$&

    K,.. this thread is dedicated to the dumass teachers/proffesors who can speak real NEAT english! Am sure there wud be lot to share by all on this topic.

    Small incidence to start with, I had my exam recently, n we had some dum Arts Proffessor to supervise us. We r supposed to keep our cells on the proff's table before sitting for the exam. SO all done, last ten mins remainin, n this prick (proff) starts yellin,

    "WHO IS MOBILE" <<-- guess meant to ask, whose mobiles are these

    Then,... wen no one gave a fuk,... he yelled even louder,
    "4 MOBILE IS HERE" ,... still no one gave a fuk,...

    Then, wen finally the finish time bell rang, he went,

    WTF,... where do these cartoons get a proff job from man! Will post more once i find my graduation years book. :p:
  2. CrYpTiC_angel

    CrYpTiC_angel Rebelle!

    hahaha... how abt bad pronunciations??

    my bio teach in class 12 was a total loser..

    i rem we had to perform an experiment in the lab. the object of that exp was "To test the given urine sample for the presence of urea, ketone bodies blah blah..." and guess how he said it :grin:

    "To TASTE the URINE..." :RollLol:

    I almost died laughing (if i remember correctly, he kicked me outta lab...)
  3. shsnawada

    shsnawada Cyborgs &amp; Pasta

  4. akkyy21

    akkyy21 #%@!$&

    C'mon,.. thats the most lame thread on this topic man, that shit is goin around for like 100 years now. Put in yr originals here! Be reallllll dude!

    @ Cryptic : So,... did anyone "Taste" the urine? :p: I mean u r out of consideration since u were kicked out, so,.... who did it? hehe
  5. shak

    shak Harrr!

    its pungent and a bit salty ..^
    @trish: LOL LOL ...
    now my original .. i was 11 or something .. a virgin to coffee and tea .. but wanted to step into a starbucks (cafe) and taste the sweet brown nectar *all by myself* (yeah the manly harmones kickin in)... so went in .. it was lunch time .. and winter .. so the starbucks was full restless office pencil pushers ... and by this time ..really irritated . anyway .. got to the bar trailing a huge que .. and read the menu thoughtfully .. acting all grown up .. then finally .. blurted .. can i have one chocolate "mosha" please? .. the guy gave me the dirtiest look ever .. lol .. i trie again .. mocha? (as in cha-cha) .. and before i could get the second dritiest look .. the guy on my back yelled.. "just give the kid a mocha" ..
    that was embarrassing .. came home and learned the pronuncitaion for all coffees (latte,mocha, cupuccino, espresso .. etc .. including the french versions of pour homme, eua de toilette etc.. )
  6. Petunia

    Petunia terminally dorky


    Here's one:
    A remember a time when i was in India mustve been about two years ago. Went to a party and overheard this one guy talking a friend of his. Must have been discussing some good fortune cos all of a sudden he shouts out, "Hey, get us a glass of Shum-Pug-nae!" (Champagne) And then there was silence before the waves of laughter rolled over me :RollLol: And no one could manage to shut me up.
  7. abhimanjrekar

    abhimanjrekar ----&gt; Zhol-Man&lt;----

    i had one professor wen i was in my first year........once in lecture , 3 people wer talkin and disturbin him...so this was wat he said.......BOTH OF U THREE GET OUT OF MY CLASS.........
  8. anshphenomenon

    anshphenomenon Rape me :boff:

    there was this chemistry teacher of mine..
    he was having a class once...we were in a christian school..so our father principal was on usual rounds of the school..
    so this guy was teaching once when we were shouting and all. in the class.. just as when the father principal hapened to pass by the class...
    that guy said "be quiet father has just passed away"

    the same guy was teaching and we were not paying attention as usual...when again the principal was in the corridor...so this guy said"be quiet father is rotating in the corridor"
  9. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    heard an old joke "tumhara natoore(nature) aisa hai to tumhara fatoore(future) kaisa hoga?.."


    @ srk.. ewww
  10. vishwa_81us

    vishwa_81us Banned

    are excellent thread.. this reminded me of our Microprocessor proff in college during engg days..

    one day he suddenly asked on student to stand up and said.." Yesterday I saw u roaming with my wife !!!!" the student almost fainted... he told " sir i was not with ur wife please believe me..." actually wat proff meant was that.. " yesterday when i was roaming with my wife i saw u.."
  11. guitarandgirls

    guitarandgirls New Member

    Really funny

    Reminds me of my HR Proff who is actually good in Eng but that day he had a tongue slip and said, "There are 3 ladies on the Board of ICICI and all of them are female"

    But we all knew that it was just a slip of tongue hence we kept quite. Thats it!!
  12. ronnieanand

    ronnieanand n00bier th@n th0u

    In my college I had to pay some fine for Shortage of Attendance. I had some 15% attendance in Strength Of Materials and the prof was seriously nice guy. He agreed to make it 60%, so that I dont get detained. So I went to the office, paid the fine and went to him. So it was like this....

    Prof: Paid the Fine ?
    Me: Yes.

    Prof: No, Paid the Fine ?
    Me: Yes

    (A few more of the same Q&A)

    Prof: No, Paid the Fine ?
    Me: ???? (Severely Confused). So I said No for change.

    Prof: Go, paid the fees and came. I will give you the attendance.
  13. nebuchadnezzar

    nebuchadnezzar G34r G33k

    A classic overheard in Engineering Drawing,first Year at IITM:

    "All of you should score above the class average"
  14. Alfons

    Alfons C.F.H

    @nebu...hahahhahahahahahaha ...ROTFL

    well i'm still in school so..there's this computer teacher here..so once when asked how many children he has ..he answered :


    he's got a reputation of speaking like this ....

    A couple of more from him ...
    1. My scooter is understanding the tree.
    2. Open the windows and let the Climate come in . ( when the class started laughing he TRIED to correct his error by saying OPEN THE WINDOWS AND LET THE AIR FORCE COME IN ) hahaha
  15. Luthier

    Luthier New Member

    :RollLol: :RollLol:
    Great thread.
    I had this prof. in engineering teaching Jigs n Fixtures.
    Here is what he said.............
    ....."sometimes we are the define the jig and say that this one is the one fixture. But one of the truths is that this one is the only a jig and a fixture is the one very different from this one." :think: :think: :annoyed:
  16. amit82cse

    amit82cse Silent observeR

    Miss Under Standing = Misunderstanding
  17. guitarangela

    guitarangela gran'ma

    i heard it somewhere, but don't remember.......
    there was this girl who was very bossy about passing 4th grade after 3 tries.....

    she wanted to take a pic or something......what she said was
    " Please take a closet picture of me?" there were a couple of other statements by her. will upload them after i remember it.....
  18. guitarangela

    guitarangela gran'ma

    bossy people

    sorry, a repetition occurred somehow!!!!!!!!!1
  19. GuitarTiger

    GuitarTiger New Member

    LOL these are FUNNY ive had ppl say weird stff but this is funnier
  20. vishwa_81us

    vishwa_81us Banned

    ok one more from my microproccessor proff...

    "All boys have gone to call girls "

    what he meant was " all the boys have gone to call the girls for next lecture "

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