Real Matrimony site profiles...LMAO

These are actual ads on a matrimony site(A very famous one...don't ask me which). Grammar and spell errors have
no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the
heart!
Disclaimer : I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after
reading this mail...



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

- Hello To Viewvers My Name is Sowmya , I am single i
dont have male,
If
any
one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my home. I
am not a good
education
but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u
welcome to my
heart...
when ever u whant to meet pls viset my resident or
send u letter..
Thanks
yours Regards Sowmya ~*~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i want very simple boy. from brahmin educated family
from orissa state
she
is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and
other homework

(Homework?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wants a man who knows me better and can adjust with
me forever. he may
never
create any difficulties in my life or his life by
which the entire life
can
run smoothly. thank you

(The principle of running life smoothly was never so
easy!)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

he should be good looking and should have a service.
he Shoulsd have
one
brother and one sister. he should be educated.

(ain't it unique !! 1 brother 1 sister criteria !)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every
moments of life. I love
to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a first
step of love. I am
looking for my dreamboy who will love me more than i.
Because i love
myself
a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on .
hold
my hand forever !!!

(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i am simple girl.I have lot ofproblemin mylife
because ofmylucknow i
amlooking oneboyhe caremeandloveme lot lot lot

(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My husband should be as 'Shiva' as in Kahani Ghar
Ghar Ki and as
Tanwerr as
in KSBKBT......

(Ok I haven't seen these soaps but I am sure she must
be demanding too
much,
ain't he?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i want a boy with no drinks if he wants he can wear
jeans in house but
while
steping out of house he should give recpect to our
cast

(by not wearing his jeans? Wat the hell...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GIRL,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO
MAKE ANY BODY TO
LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS
ARE THE REAL
MESSENGER
OF
GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A BOY ,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE
IN
GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY
SHOULD NOT GET BORED
WITH
ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(all of us are loughing{laughing})

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

whatever he may be but he should feel that he is
going to be someone
groom
and he must think of the future life if he is toolike
this he would bde
called the man of the lamp

(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me
what this girl
wants)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my
patner and i love
the
patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok

(I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The
person is
suffering
from "Ok-syndrome")

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HI IAM VERY COOL NUATHER OK MY HOBBY IS SEE T.V AND
NEWS OK I HAVE 1
CAR
AND
1 BONWL OK MY MOTHER ALSO GOOD OK MY FARUET WORLD IS
OK

(the "ok syndrome" again)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

iam pranati my family histoy my two brother two
sister and fater&mother
sister complity marred

(somebody please explain in comments section how to
get married
'completely'?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

iam very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one
brother and parent.
i
am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original
resdence at
kalahandi
diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist.

(actually what is this girl doing? Postal service or
tailor.??)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

my name is farhanbegum and i am unmarried. pleaes you
marrige me pleaes
pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes

(height of desperation! J )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Iwant one boy who love me or my mother. he love me
heartly or he havea
frank
he's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey.
IThink the main
think
is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are
beautiful.
but
iam not a handsome girl or not a good looking. but my
Mom say that Iam
a
good girl. My father already expired . iam
''AEKLAUTA''. THE CHOICE IS
YOUR.
bye bye.

(uttama purishinin)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

iam kanandevi. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was
marred.

(No comments)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON'T HAVE ANY
HABIT.

(maybe the poor guy meant BAD habits)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

hello i am a good charactarised woman. i want to run
my life happily.i
divorced my first husband.his charactor is not good'.
i expect the good
minded and clean habits boy who may be in the same
caste or other caste
accepted ...

(but credit cards not accepted..???) :think:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

my colour is black,but my heart is white.i like
social service

(Zebra..???) :shock:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i'm looking out for who lives in bombay, boy simple
who trust me lot
should
be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY.

(Now that criterion is a must, isn't it?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to be married on jan-2005. working man perferable

(this girl has fixed the marriage date too! But she
is yet to find a
bridegroom.
I wish him best of luck on behalf of all of us. I am
sure she will get one
soon.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i would like a beautyfull boy. and i do not want his
any treasure.
because boy is the maharaja. :shock: :rock:

(Now he is going to be a lucky boy! Any takers?)



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ssc failed three times and worked with privated ltd
company which not
paying
salary at present.:help:


I AM SPEECHLESS!:beer:

 

i think this is stuff is pretty old, but .. really lmaaaooo

My fav.


my colour is black,but my heart is white.i like
social service

(Zebra..???)

 

ROTFLMAO

:RollLol:


fuk....this is freaking hillarious

 

Iwant one boy who love me or my mother. he love me
heartly or he havea
frank
he's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey.
IThink the main
think
is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are
beautiful.
but
iam not a handsome girl or not a good looking. but my
Mom say that Iam
a
good girl. My father already expired . iam
''AEKLAUTA''. THE CHOICE IS
YOUR.
bye bye.

:RollLol::RollLol::RollLol:
this ones my fav!

All the underlined parts>

Luv me or my mother:shockpeverted mind!)
not blac not a whitie(then whats in the middle>Grey)
HANDSOME GIRL????????????????????(who wants u to be?):RollLol:

 

Here is my parpooz, with this reds rose.
Please don't you the reject my parpooz
b'coz I don't parpooz the ROZ ROZ."

 

Dude, I think this is one of the few CC threads that were able to crack me up THAT much. ROFLMAO

 

I dunno....I somehow see through the humour here and find it sad.

 

Got to agree with bjr.

The world is full of lonely people
But the thruth is most of us have been there or will be there.

I just thank god i ain't one of em now.

 

heh, same here. Its sad that people would put up some form of advertisement of themselves on the internet. Services have gone from:

- Find an address
- Find a house
- Find a job

and then find a wife.

But still funny as hell.

 

Christ...!Thats like hillarious stuff there!Sure cracked me up!

 

Seriously....probably the fear of that is why I did not even crack a smile while reading through that.

 

aye .......

 

Thanks bjr, now i feel like a total ass.

 

Gotta admit..

 

nono, you are THE coolest.

https://cuppycakepictograph.ytmnd.com/


Just for you <3

 

@Mr.Scary, t'is ok bro, atleast you arent attracted to some sick sense of humor..........

 

I hope you're not referring to my narcissism?:grin:

 

^Eh? Oh no, bjr, you're infinitely better than the people i was referring to. The kind that finds "dead baby" jokes amusing.

 

I suppose, for a lot of people, they're just the same as nigger jokes, surd jokes, blonde jokes, retard jokes etc. They're usually funny for their sheer stupidity rather than humour value.



eg....for this particular thread, it's probably my own insecurities that make me see the sadness. I'd probably have laughed like the rest of you otherwise.

 

^I havent laughed too, if you've noticed.