Lies - I

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by horsesmouth, May 16, 2010.

  1. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    Dun ask me, 'tis too personal, n painful, read n comment!


    He hated lies, but he lied himself,
    in strangers his faith lay spent.
    For all the falsehoods, agony to come,
    and in the wake, left to repent.

    Twined inside, a double hooded serpent,
    in the basket filled of lies.
    To poison those who fed its mouth,
    and kill them, who for him would die.

    In the words of the charmer he went,
    to feed on other's anguished cries.
    Never felt the pang of betrayal,
    Never felt the love that dies.

    And then one day, the world collapsed,
    inward, into his shallowness;
    swallowing him whole;
    relishing on his weakness.
    And in the whole catastrophe,
    only five people died.
    First was the trust he held,
    and was his faith's last cry.

    The other two, much like them,
    went the love, and the kin.
    And left alone with bent knees, staring in the sky,
    were the eyes that belonged to him.
     
  2. nandy0894

    nandy0894 New Member

    oh ur god!!!! dis is sooo... soo... sooo...i dun know wat to cmnt...its heartbreaking ... overwhelming...nd insane- emotnal...dragged me to tears man...!!! unbelievable!!!
     
  3. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    well i must'nt say thanks, or m glad i made u cry :p
    bt i'll take it as a compliment,.,,
    thanks-a-lott, this is the most emo topic of my poetries til date...
     
  4. allstarsband

    allstarsband New Member

    Yes, its so overwhelmingly amazing, most emotional thing ever i seen.
    u rock man!
    Hats off to you

    & does the title mean u gonna put up a sequel too?
     
  5. metalhead_junky

    metalhead_junky New Member

    Truly the best of yours till date......................n yes, u're putting up a sequel?
    cant wait......urs previous trilogies were just tooooooo awesum
    n this 1 exceeds both of them.....
     
  6. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    so many thanks, both of u
    my my....no of ppl seems 2 hv increased suddenly..
    good...
     
  7. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    n yes..a sequel is coming up..
    in some tym.....
    funny, i thought my first trilogy, i thought 'twas quite silly...ppl appreciated it though!
     
  8. sukriti_hats

    sukriti_hats Member

    u stare in the sky
    u cry, cry and cry
    why don't u stop looking behind
    no, the world isn't kind
    i don't know what to say
    because for u, m also a stranger and stray
    maybe m doing this out of care
    the reason why on your lines, i stare

    okay...this ws an instant response as a poem :)
    btw....ummmm...ok forget it
    nice poem!
     
  9. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    hmmmm
    u're rYt...
    but u know, something happened tht made me remember all this.....hence the poem
    :D
    thanks bdw
     
  10. rickkkyrich

    rickkkyrich Guest

    nice nice nice... bravo !!!
     
  11. sukriti_hats

    sukriti_hats Member

    @horsesmouth: okayy frankly spking...i ws expecting a better reply
    something like....something like...ohhh leave it
    but cum'on i wrote a poem for u :(:(:(
     
  12. suprita

    suprita New Member

    Wow.... Dat was awesum.....
     
  13. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    aww......
    now i'd say nething it'd b called a reaction.....
    but.... rilly..umm...tht was so vry sweeet of u... n i get the message too...
     
  14. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    thnks a lot suprita.....long tym.......
     
  15. i wont comment till u explain it... im dumb...plz do the favour
     
  16. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    okay........i dint wanna do this ......but.......

    its bout the character......who lied
    lied to his own dear people....
    lied bcoz he trusted som1......n fell for those words....

    but no lie can sustain forever
    so it did.....n destroyed evry1 around
    he lost his faith, his trusting nature,
    lost his love, n his dear ones were shattered too
    n he was left alone to ponder over his misdeeds....

    hope thts enuf?.....
     
  17. allstarsband

    allstarsband New Member

    yes...
    u write differently...evident in all your posts...u go bout a topic in a roundabout manner
    just not the typical painful poem..thts y ur poetries look so fresh...
    n i rily liked the last 8 lines, dey're too awesome...
     
  18. oh hooo ...hmm...and thought.......

    that i was wrong...lol

    i knw waht these lines ment... gud poem..reps added
     
  19. imsut spread some reputatio around before giving it to you
     
  20. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    I dunno y after repping evry1 here, still m nt able to rep ne1 again...
    is dis y ppl dun rep nemore>??
     

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