attached to you... you told me, 'yo we gotta keep in touch... cause I can't lose someone like you'... and I figured that a bond like this could never fade, it was always bliss but I didn't know you would turn your back and I'd still be here... all alone do you know that pain yo? when someone takes you into their arms and makes you their own and then turns around and makes you unknown again you know that pain? man can you feel that pain? you've got to flow in the current of life but in this cyclical strife, it would be sweet as hell to float with you everybody needs a sense of belonging at least I do we're all rolling stones and at the end we can carry no moss but by God, until the end, how I'd love to roll with you I think that maybe it's trust maybe it's friendship maybe it's love this feeling... but I know that though I am free you're always there in spirit this abandon, this betrayal that feeling... is never free -saurabh v. Copyright ©2004 Saurabh Kumar Varma
Good, but whats up with all the Yo's?? Is this supposed to be rap or something?? The first two stanzas were okay. Too informal.You know what i mean? The rest were very good though. Good job.
good point i know what you're sayin man. it doesn't make sense to say yo's that much. it's not really a rap song at all. but when i write songs, it's always complete expression and yo helps me convey emotion and feel in the song. i guess that i could take them out as well... i dunno man... it just helps give me a personal touch on it. really hammers out the emotion. i like really deep songs, but i dont feel like they should be formal.. i dunno man.. no yo's might make it better too. i'll try it out. hah i guess if i get produced or somethin (which is a longshot) i could change it.
another point... i usually don't like to talk about it... but it is kind of a personal experience... so it's more to me than just a poem or neatly trimmed song. it's like me... i dunno man.
If u feel the yo's help you convey ur emotion better, then just stick to them. Ultimately only ur opinion matters. Anyway, keep it up.
