When life went up in smoke..

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by siddarth_d, Apr 3, 2007.

  1. siddarth_d

    siddarth_d New Member

    When life went up in smoke and dope,
    Till I hit my death bed, I never did lose hope

    I started smoking at the age of seven,
    Felt as if I was at the gates of heaven.

    Years passed by, I became a teenager
    Smoke was my best pal, my only friend in a wager.

    Years kept passing by, I completed the journey from a teenager to man
    Smoke was what I breathed, ate and slept, my only buddy and my only fan

    Late one night, I spurted blood
    Thought that this was a stream, waiting was the flood

    I was hospitalized, diagnosed with cancer, the dreaded disease
    My lungs had shriveled like a blown out balloon, life was about to cease

    Life was my mistress, smoke my wife
    I realized that I had made the wrong choice.

    Smoke kills more than bullets, yet we smoke
    At the balloon called life, we continue to poke

    When life went up in smoke and dope
    After this,there can never be hope
  2. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    this is possibly a streak u have it in u of choosing sensitive, meaningful and deep themes and writing down a poem on it with relative ease. take this compliment of mine for all ur poems coz i dont wanna give the same feedback for all of em :)

    hmm..nice poem
    hope we see some people heading to Nicotine Anonymous..lol
  3. CrYpTiC_angel

    CrYpTiC_angel Rebelle!

    i found it a bit kiddish, as if it were for homework or smthng :/
  4. d_ist_urb_ed

    d_ist_urb_ed Genuflect b*tches!

    Missed your bluntness, mmwahh
  5. #iR@


    must say u have a differnt style of riting man! :)
  6. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    Its good...but I found it to be all so common..smoking-->fun at first--->cancer--->regrets--->enlightenment...
    There even used to be an ad when I was young which showed this very theme (in public interest)..maybe thats why I found it to be predictible..

    The topic was a bit serious and so I'd prefer if you'd been a bit more expressive..

    Forgive me for being all so negative about your work....

    On a positive note,I did find the rhymes amusingly good.

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