Uski Khushi

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by i'm_not_neo, Oct 18, 2006.

  1. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    I don't know what to say.It's my first poem here and AI'm semi nervous that its silly, semi nervous its stupid...I guess there must be all poets in this forum so plz recommend any changes....

    Dekhar hi usse
    Milta tha sukoon
    Pyaar ka jo
    Sar par chad gaya tha junoon

    Ajeeb pyaar tha woh
    Har pal Bhagwan say yahi maangta tha
    Saath mere n ho toh bhi
    Woh khush rahe yahi chahta tha.

    Is hi bar Bhagwan ne sun li meri
    Fir bhi koi sheekhwa nahi
    Uski yadon mein
    Akele asoon pi liye maine
    Lekin aaj bhi yahi maanga iss dil ne
    Woh jaha bhi hon khush rahe

    Kismat mein likha ho to jaroor milegi
    Pyaar sachcha ho to jaroor milegi
    Tab tak is dil ki har dhadkan
    tere khushiyon ke liye duaan karegi.
     
  2. basit_jaaaani

    basit_jaaaani I'm gUnnin' fer uuu

    very nice effort
     
  3. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    thank you...definitely trying to improve...
     
  4. rocker_vish

    rocker_vish New Member

    boss....gr8 poem....got tears in ma eyes......coz me ..comin out frm a heartbreak :(
     
  5. born2tab

    born2tab rhythm guitarist


    Wah ustaad wah...to aapko bhi is poem ke keede ne kaat liya..n e way original and nice one...was it really from the heart...i mean really misin someone:think:
     
  6. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    @born2tab...yeah that one is indeed my sad love story...thank you for appreciating the poem though..
    @rocker_vish...thank you, too...hope you get over the heartbreak.
     

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