universal song...

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by varmas11, Feb 19, 2005.

  1. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    Universal Song

    yo, for my thirst of fire, I get a rap on the wrist
    my river of peace then quells open my fist
    people tellin me yo… 'that's not practical'
    they want somethin seen man…- somethin that’s tangible
    yeah, focusin' in on one material frame
    forgettin that what's outside could be the same
    opportunity-cost is what the economists say
    politicians, campaigns sayin yay or nay
    right or wrong is what the lawyers say
    people in the cycle repeatin it day by day
    yo, lose this dual, infantile practicality
    you've got to levitate to an ideal mentality
    forget what's seen, for that is fleeting
    focus on the unseen, for that's what's beating
    beyond sight and reason, free from chains
    everlasting freedom and sun... not rain and pains..
    deep within the heart and the universal soul in the core
    shed the physical, instead of wanting materially more
    don't get lost in this world's lore
    find yo soul and release the torr
    rap yourself on the wrist, when you say, that aint practical
    go for ideal brotha, or get lost in the cyclical

    yo...
    sing with me the song of us
    sing with me of love and one
    forget the I
    forget the my
    spread the light
    feel the might
    sing...
    one... ek... uno...
    ee... un...
    one...
    universal song…
    universal song…

    but the skeptic says oh, ideal is futile
    practical’s what we need, that’s what’s worthwile
    ‘oh practical’s what we need’, are you ****in serious?
    Greed, violence, hate, blood, you want us to go delirious ?
    i guess that we're just not all brothas
    i mean look at the rift between crackas and niggas
    the pakis and desis, blood is in the street
    12 yr old kid stabbed and dead at his mother's feet
    rivers and pools are filled with blood
    creation has reached another great flood
    from the crystal blue and breath of peace, love, and life
    in comes the red and wave of greed, hate, and strife
    muh****in IQs of a hundred fifty
    studying some science and hypocrisy
    wastin their minds on a fleeting illusion
    they ain't feelin' fire and led into confusion
    so my skeptic, you think that we're in progress?
    take off your blindfold and look at our regress
    you hate ideal and just love practicality
    for experience, you took away innocence and our purity
    for the illusion and material, you shot us with calamity
    well congratu ****in lations, mr. practicality

    yo...
    sing with me the song of us
    sing with me of love and one
    forget the I
    forget the my
    spread the light
    feel the might
    sing...
    one... ek... uno...
    ee... un...
    one...
    universal song…
    universal song…


    so then what's ideal?
    how not know and just feel?
    there's no black or white
    no my or I
    eventually, it all just blends into one
    like all the rays meeting back at the sun
    we don't need these fake boundaries or a line
    we gotta call up our inner and unite our divine

    yo...
    sing with me the song of us
    sing with me of love and one
    forget the I
    forget the my
    spread the light
    feel the might
    sing...
    one... ek... uno...
    ee... un...
    one...
    universal song…
    universal song…


    universal…



    -sv
     
    rizaaj and Subhro like this.
  2. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    no one likes it ?
    haha man... i think this song is gonna be so tight once i add the beat and stuff. if anybody at least has any suggestions or criticisms, that'd be great too.

    feedback in general is great..

    thanks guys,
    saurabh


    check out

    www.purevolume.com/saurabhvarma
     
  3. Nirvanafreak

    Nirvanafreak Official Freak

    hmm...I kinda like it,I'm eager to know what it sounds like when you add the beat and all...
     
  4. Nirvanafreak

    Nirvanafreak Official Freak

    by the way,would you mind checking out the poems 'missing you' and 'memories' and tell me what you think about them? :rockon:
     
  5. Subhro

    Subhro Argentina lost :"(

    @varmas11 ... tht was awesome ... :shock: gvin u reps. :) post more of ur work..
     
  6. rizaaj

    rizaaj Forum Leader

    great work varmas.. keep up.. waiting to hear its audio...
     
  7. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    hey,

    thanks a lot guys for your feedback. appreciate it. i will try to get the song together from its lyrical shape right now. it's still developing i guess. i'll check out your stuff nirvanafreak no doubt. i just have mad work and i wanna give it my complete time and effort before i give feedback.

    for the people that didn't like it, is it too vigorous? too ghetto or not poetic? my goal for my songwriting and expression is not to inspire a group or a type of people. i too wish that my audience is universal as well. so if i can get any insight on the type of things that people feel wrong with this or if the expression is weak or rhymes or poor or flow is bad, that would help..


    take care guys,
    saurabh
     
  8. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    any more comments or feedback ?
     

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