This is my first post;a song.

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by alphanomad, Oct 15, 2006.

  1. alphanomad

    alphanomad New Member

    Broken windows of my life
    barricade destiny's stride
    the lights blow out in my head
    as i go through the motions of this life

    Broken windows me surround
    shattered dreams all around
    hope's snuffed out, the light flickers out
    i see the end
    sad , cold eyes mirror them

    Broken windows ,sharp as knives
    pain and sorrow fill my life
    my heart bleeds for cold comfort
    crimson pools reflect my life
    i see blind destiny
    marching on with the blind man's stride
    she stumbles and falls ,never to rise

    broken windows....


    Bouquets n brickbats r welcome.
  2. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    not a very cogently written piece ...some repatation and confusion in thoughts ..... the contrast even is missing.....cant say good but culd have been better..!
  3. alphanomad

    alphanomad New Member

    thanks a lot for your thoughts madhuresh..!
  4. #iR@


    good effort :)... but i think this was a sentence that ended the whole effect end in the second para...

    ...Broken windows me surround...

    otherwise... nice!

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