the traveler

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by varmas11, Feb 22, 2005.

  1. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    "O' where are you going, traveler" I said.
    coat tucked into the wind
    billowed hat over your eyes.
    gusts of air touch
    yet they don't catch your face.
    I see curious wrinkles
    and a smile of the sun
    place to place you wander,
    leaving your mark.
    a connection of the heart
    but never a tethered bond
    down your curving path you go
    to where you meander, I really do not know.
    “O' traveler where are you going?
    non-attached you are, show me freedom”.
    the traveler shows a gleam of wisdom
    a twinkle in his eye, he tells me this,
    "I am not special. I am just like you.
    seek not, merely look".
    so I chance upon a shard of glass
    and I gaze into the shimmering mirror
    taken aback, epiphany strikes
    smiling like the sun, I say, "hello traveler"
  2. tejas

    tejas ..........

    Really impressive work. I like the style in which its written. Good work.
  3. rev

    rev New Member

    "I am not special. I am just like you.
    seek not, merely look".
    That was well said! Real good. But if I may add, give spaces and divide it into stanzas. It somehow adds to the appeal of the poem.
  4. varmas11

    varmas11 New Member

    that's a good idea rev,

    i think it'll help the poem flow better... i'll try to do that soon

    feeback from others is always welcome

  5. Nirvanafreak

    Nirvanafreak Official Freak

    you know? I really enjoyed reading this,keep them coming :)

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