The Delight Within

The Delight Within


When the sun goes down on me
And I look above to find the distant stars
The clouds make the shape of a big tree
And cover me with all its mourning shadows
I hear a voice from the distant memories
Trying to hold me from falling
But I get struck off
As I was going far away from reality
So I got engulfed by a tunnel
Where I could move deeper and deeper
Towards the darkness which could never end
But I always cheer
As I lighted the world
With all the sunshine and all my love​

 

describes the motto of our lives perfectly...reps for u :beer:

 

Remember, at the end of the tunnel...you will find the sunShine. Keep Smiling.

 

Gives a feeling of transition phase ..
..very nicely put forth

Hey Sanjay,
do post some more of your work
i presume its been a long time..

PS- "But I get struck off
As I was going far away from reality
So I got engulfed by a tunnel"

is confusing me a bit :

 

nicely written ... but ya how can a tunnel engulf u ?...chalo thats what poetry is all about a little bit of reality and lot of virtual-reality....good poem

 

Thanks a lot Garima, Mudgal, Bubbly and Madhuresh.

@Bubbly, that's what U are to think about. Don't U see that Madhuresh did come to a conclusion himself?

 

nahi Sanjay bhai u shoud tell if u can...most ppl dont answer me..so i conviently ask my self get an answer and

 

hey I like it....very expressive...how can a tunnel engulf? it is symbolic and that is the beauty of the poem...there is a little bit of symbolism mixed into reality and a good job of it too ... thumbsup

-arpi

 

delighted to read ur delight within....
madhuresh concluded on his own...wud like to hear conclusion from poet himself...

 

It means that I had been enveloped in such a life where life had no existance or also being alive there's no life. Life moved towards sadness and there's no way left to get out of it........





Confusing Again?

 

"When the sun goes down on me
And I look above to find the distant stars
The clouds make the shape of a big tree
And cover me with all its mourning shadows
I hear a voice from the distant memories
Trying to hold me from falling
But I get struck off
As I was going far away from reality
So I got engulfed by a tunnel
Where I could move deeper and deeper
Towards the darkness which could never end
But I always cheer
As I lighted the world
With all the sunshine and all my love"

Your poem lacks few punctuations which are very very important in conveying the right message.
for example "And I look above, to find the distant stars"
Comma signifies a pause that also signifies a poetic expression too.

Anyway a well done job could have been better.

 

^^^ Thanks a lot for all the suggestion.... but I left did left out all the punctuations becoz in modern poetry we dont need the punctuations.

 

^^True and good thought

 

^^^ Now, I think that I made U clear.

Well, thanks a lot.