A virile, young Italian man was relaxing at his favourite bar in Rome, when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde. Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment, and after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom for ***. After a pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile, "So... You finish?" She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, "No." Surprised, the young man reached for her and the love-making resumed. This time she thrashes about wildly and there are screams of passion. The love-making ends, and again, the young man smiles, and again he asks, "You finish?" And again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to him, and softly says, "No." Stunned, but damned if this woman is going to outlast him, the young man reaches for the woman again. Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they climax simultaneously, screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets. The exhausted Italian falls onto his back, gasping. Barely able to turn his head, he looks into her eyes, smiles proudly, and asks again, "You finish?" Barely able to speak, she whispers in his ear, "No, I Norwegian!"
True Story: A Boys Last wish "Cameron Diaz" https://www.chaser.com.au/show_story.asp?ID=638&ED=68&CAT=6&NAME=diaz
A small collection When I get big, fat, and juicy... There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a p*nis sitting around talking about how their lives sucked. The cucumber "Man, my life sucks. When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad." The pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a jar." The penis looks at him and says, "You think you have it rough? When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick a rubber tarp on my head, stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I throw up and pass out!." Argument About *** A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoyed *** more. The man said, "Men obviously enjoy *** more than women. Why do you think we're so obsessed with getting laid?" "That doesn't prove anything," the woman countered. "Think about this... When your ear itches and you put your little finger in it and wiggle it around, then pull it out, which feels better-your ear or your finger? I can tell how a man makes love... John and Jill were about to go into his apartment, and before he could open his door, Jill said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door." John says, "Well, give me some examples." Jill proceeds to tell him, "Well, the first way is, if a guy shoves his key into the lock, and opens the door hard, then that means he is a rough lover and that isn't for me." "The second way is if a man fumbles around and can't seem to find the hole, then that means he is inexperienced and that isn't for me either." Then Jill said, "Honey, how do you unlock your door?" John proceeds to say, "Well, first, before I do anything else, I lick the lock." I'm not eating any more chicken... A little boy and girl at school were having lunch in the shelter shed. "Tommy," she said, "I'm not eating any more chicken sandwiches." "Why?" he asked. "'Cause I'm starting to grow feathers down here," she said, pointing to the bottom of her tummy. "I don't believe you," he said. "You'll have to show me." Behind the shed they went, where the inspection took place. "You're right," he said. "I've been eating a lot of chicken also. Perhaps I'm getting feathers too." "Well, I'd better have a look," she said. After a lengthy examination, she looked up and said, "Oh, I think it's too late for you. You've got the neck and giblets too." Three Inches - HOT! An Italian man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular table , he noticed a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby.... all alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to be sent over to her, - knowing that if she accepts it, she is his. The waiter gets the bottle and quickly sends it over to the girl, saying this from the gentleman. She looks at the wine and decides to send a note over to the man. The note read: "For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank, and 7 inches in your pants. The man, after reading the note, sends one of his own back to her and it read: "Just so you know - I happen to have a Ferrari Testarosa, a BMW 850iL, and a Mercedes 560SEL in my garage; plus I have over twenty million dollars in the bank." "But, not even for a woman beautiful as you, would I cut off three inches. Just send the bottle back!!!
Last Page Of the Book:warn weak heart people this is an interesting but true story which i received from my friend living in NDehli. Read this true story... and let everybody you know in and around Delhi, especially Gurgaon know this....... My friend lives in Rohini... One day he went to Gurgaon to visit >>>his uncle for some days. One evening he and some other of my college friends went to PVR Priya's(a cinema hall) for a movie. He had so much fun that he forgot that it was very late. He reached Gurgaon around midnight...... He had to walk about a mile from where his friend dropped him.... As he was walking alone, he could sense that the night felt very creepy as it was so dark. While walking, he was astonished to see an old creepy looking guy selling some books. It was a very unusual thing to see a thing like that..... It got the shivers on him when he noticed that his old guy is unusually pale and staring at him... The old guy said "Son why don't you get a book...it would keep you company". Then he did something which he would regret for the rest of his life ......... My friend started to act brave & thought why not & had a look at his collection.. he noticed that all the books were related to supernatural activities...but he found one that was very interesting. So he asked the old man "how much is it?".... The old guy replied, "Well son...this is an interesting book...it's only for Rs 250. " My friend was shocked and said "but...but... it's expensive" This time the old man stared which freaked my friend. My friend quickly checked all his pockets & found Rs.200 & said "This is all I hav e." The old guy replied "It's OK son ...you can have the book for that price" As ! my friend was just about to run for home...the old man called back & said "Son ... whatever happen, you don't ever flip the book to it's last page... remember these words or you would regret it...DONT FLIP THE BOOK TO ITS LAST PAGE!!!!!" My friend nodded and never looked back ... Reaching home...he quickly asked his Uncle whether there was any new old book seller nearby? The Uncle replied "not that I know of but ...we've heard that there's 1 old man comes once in a while during full moon nights but heard that there is something creepy about it...why son?" My friend freaked out... he told his uncle "nothing uncle...just asking". He started reading the book with the old man's words on his mind. At night, 2 0'clock, as he went to bed, a gush of wind blew which chilled him up to his bones. At that glimpse, he noticed the wind had blown the pages to its last page. He remembered what the old man has said! But we humans tend to have the tendency to know. Out of curiosity, he flipped to the last page & fainted... >>> > >>> > What he saw at the last page is stated below: >>> >>> > >>> > Don't look further down if you have a weak heart I warn you >>> > >>> > .......... >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >> > > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > >>> >>> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > > Original price:-- Rs. 20/- >>> >>> > >>> > > Promotion price:-- Rs. 10/- >>> >>> > >>> > ********************************** he he he he hhe hhe
imao....nice stuff doc nd dlogic..... heres my contribution A 54-year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening that reads: Dear Wife, I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and s3xy 18-year old secretary. When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows: Dear Husband, I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with my handsome and virile 18-year old boy toy. Since you are an accountant, you will appreciate that 18 go into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18 Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that mommy?" he asked. "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. "What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"
A Red Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand and a bucket of buffalo manure in the other. He says to the waiter, "Me want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure chief, comin right up." He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee, and the Indian drinks it down in one gulp, picks up the bucket of manure, throws it into the air, blasts it with the shotgun, then just walks out. The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand and a bucket of buffalo manure in the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, "Me want coffee." The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto! We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What the heck was all that about, anyway?" The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Me training for upper management position: Come in, drink coffee, shoot some crap, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for rest of day." : )))
ive got a simliar one: a panda walks into a bar. the bartender asks - panda, wat dyu want. the panda says - gimme some ofood. bartender: normally iwouldnt give a panda food but ill make an exceptin for u . he gives him some food. the panda takes out a gun and shoots eery1 in the bar and walks out. the bartender runs after him and asks him y he did tha. the panda says: a panda eats shoots and leaves... yes really sad... but well..
