Ocean Rock

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by i'm_not_neo, Apr 11, 2008.

  1. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    I'm sure the title is wrong...anyway...simple poem(yet another). :)

    She makes a castle
    the princess she feels that she is.
    But so close to the sea..
    Doesn't she knows the castle won't last long there?
    Doesn't she knows the waves don't care?
    I see the ruthless waves melt her dreams away
    But what's this?
    She's smiling as she builds another,
    ahhh!Fortified walls around this one!
    I guess I'll never understand humans,
    for from their mistakes they learn..

    He's a warrior...you can tell
    A war cry and he's off
    an epic battle against the waves
    to reach the ocean's core
    where he always seems to lose
    as he's pushed back to the shore..
    Ahh the shame of defeat!
    But he's on his feet already
    Stranger yet,he laughs and giggles!
    Ahh what weird spirit is this?
    I will never understand!
    doesn't this child have any sense?
    Why does he even try?
    But I guess I'll never understand humans,
    as I hear the roaring waves teased by his puny war cry...

    They say age kills their courage
    that 'impossible' enslaves them,
    but I hope someday they get to a beach
    and see how lessons of life
    even kids can teach..
    A mere black rock I'll always be
    And as the sea turns into a field of gold
    at a new day's start,
    I used to wish I could feel the waves,
    but now I wish for a human heart..
  2. bjr

    bjr Lady of the Evening

    Superb read. You've struck gold.

    or perhaps Oil in today's scenario.
  3. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    Hehe...thanks. :)
  4. #iR@


    i seriously envy u now! *hmph* moving on... =P yes another poem from u wid a very strong idea yet again... simple hai dats wat i like about it man... =) i didnt have to use too much of my brain =P hehe... good job man.,.. keep riting :dance:
  5. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    hehe..I know!!Not much to ponder about..or 'read between the lines'..hehe...simple one :) Me likeyyy :p
    I just used to spend so much time at rock beach I thought I might as well write something on it..kids dun really play there :(
  6. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    hey this was real good ...hw come u come with so much cum all- ways ....lol
    only the last lines..why a black stone at beach wuld wish to feel the waves..

    never mind ...good poem by good poet
  7. eightytwo

    eightytwo New Member

    It's really good but why the hell were you in such a hurry to end it? It wipes out the entire romance and philosophy you created over the first two paras. A flat ending can ruin everything, mate!

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