My new composition (Comments please)

Discussion in 'IGT Soundtrack - Your Band, Your Gig, Your Music' started by parry, Sep 6, 2008.

  1. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    My new composition -'Kahin Door' (Comments please)

    This is my third composition titled "KAHIN DOOR". Feel free to comment on the song (including bricks and bats) :)
    I feel any song has four main parts and all these have to work in tandom to make it listenable.

    1. Music
    2. Lyrics
    3. Instrument
    4. Vocals
    Kindly rate the song in all these areas if possible. Thanks in advance.

    Here's the link :

    http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6863992
     
  2. absolutely_neo

    absolutely_neo New Member

    hey parry.. nice to hear your track.. happy mood tha gaane ka..
    @music
    tune is very catchy, typical bollywood style, happy mood.. great goiing man!
    strumming is appropriate to the track.. used correct chords..
    there are some low notes in the song.. which are sung awkwardly..
    you need improvement there..

    @lyrics
    Lyrics are nice.. tarana afsana n all huh.. sahi hai boss.. proper rhyming..
    well in lyrics dept you are no more beginner..

    @Instrument
    which guitar u use? lol..
    i think there is no need to comment on your instrument.. it sounds nice.

    @vocals
    well, overall vocals are pretty good. sometimes your vocals doesn't match with the chord you playing.
    You can fix it by humming exercise with the chords.
    You have sung it very artistically.. it seems like you listen to classical stuff also.
    You sung last few words of some line abruptly.. dont do that.. love each n every word in the song n spell it properly.

    well congratulations for one another original track.. i liked it!
    keep strumming and we will be listening.. all the best dude!!!
     
  3. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    Thanks Neo

    Thanks neo for so clear cut response. Your commments are very objective in nature and I really appreciate that u took time and effort for it. Agree with all u say and take them with both my hands.
    Good that u liked the music, yes its typical hindi filmy type as I am not into english rock or metal stuff.
    Well for lyrics part the subject or the theme was in mind for quite long just needed some rhyming words here and there. :grin:
    So guitar sounds nice? thanks. Btw its Sx DG1k Acoustic.
    The big hinderance are my vocals and they are not that good and I will like to improve upon that. If u were the singer, this song would have sounded very good and i can bet on that. Want to give a try? :)
    Now ur visa in place, take my best wishes. And do stay connected. and hey! when is ur stuff coming. Its been long.
     
  4. sukrut

    sukrut God Guitarist

    all ratings out of 10
    @music:8 very nice tune.......extremely catchy! and as neo said very bollywoodish!
    some chords i feel would have sounded better had you used thier barre versions.......

    @lyrics: i didnt know half of what it meant! ::p:
    i only got that your supposed to say what your heart says or something.....but nice!

    @guitar:7 well the guitar was good......but it was monotonous......what you can do is play some plucking in between and suddenly change to the super high versions of the chords i.e. like on the 10th fret and all.....then you can come back to normal chords......

    @voice:9 you own a nice voice........slight sur faults here and there.......but it was good enough.....one suggestion though....for this song especially when there is only a guitar you need to bring the voice in front...like it should dominate........make sure that happens in your next recording of this song......

    keep going man!

    cheers!
    :beer:
     
  5. abhi_ncr

    abhi_ncr New Member

    Great

    Nice one Parry... good stuff ...
     
  6. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    Thanks abhi

    Thanks abhi! you were not descriptive. Anyways thanks for showering ur 2nd post on me. Hey v both joined IGT in april! Shall I say Hurry up :)
     
  7. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    Thanks Sukrut

    Thanks for the replying effort sukrut. Needed it.
    Well its good that u liked the music part. Well Barre chords!! Oh i have always avoided learning them. Actually its been a week since i got courage and my index finger and thumb really ache man. Yes, need to learn them now.
    As for Lyrics, yes its the saying of my heart blah blah blah...:)
    Guitar part! very very good suggestion and yes i agree no matter how i tried to break the monotony still the strumming was the same in the whole song, moreover plucking in between wud have increased the time of the song too. hehe..
    Voice! Oh man 9/10? feels like hugging you. well that's an exaggeration in my support isnt it? ;)
    And its been long since u posted any thread. Come up buddy.
     
  8. bjr

    bjr Lady of the Evening

    If someone told me this song was composed by O.P.Nayyar, sung by Mohd. Rafi and picturized on Shammi Kapoor, I'd have believed them(which probably goes to show I haven't listened to them as carefully as I should have).

    The only problem I'd have with the music is that it is unoriginal. There's nothing bad about it but I wouldn't go out and buy a CD just to listen to this.


    Musicwise, I suggest you get into more chords. Go beyond the majors/minors and get into extended chords. That helps a lot for a start.


    Lyrics are nice. You've kept them simple.


    Instruments mein there's really not much to talk about. It's just an acoustic guitar. Nice strumming I guess.

    This song doesn't really suit you but you have the freedom of writing to suit your style. The problem with being inspired by bollywood is that it doesn't have much room for a voice like yours.
     
  9. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    Thanks bjr !

    Surely you are very crafty in your comments. :)
    Well so it seems that there should be some more variation in the song like sukrut pointing to go beyond 10th fret! I accept
    Good that u liked strumming unlike in my previous composition. (improvement huh!)
    As all my three decades have been passed listening to bollywood and hindi pop albums there's too much entrenchment of that kinda music in my head. Feels like shaking it a little to make some room for other stuff.
    Thanks again for airing ur comment and listening. Will trouble u once again. :grin:
     
  10. sukrut

    sukrut God Guitarist

    yeah i'll probably post a few songs........my covers are not finshed and my originals suck.......but i'll soon come up and post!
     
  11. Keoraf

    Keoraf Keyboard Player

    1. Music is good, i think you have the talent of making good songs man, in just a short time is this your third own composition, in my opinion Jana Meri Jana is the best, i really like the melody of that song
    2. Lyrics, honestly i don't care about any kind of lyrics, i barelly don't listen to the lyrics of almost all songs!
    3. Instrument, can't say much about the instrument, i think you played the guitar well, but the guitarists here can say much more about your guitarplaying
    4. Vocals has to be improved, i've noticed that your vocals are getting better and better, one thing you should pay some more attention to is just the feelings in your voice, but i think you already know it!
    Overall you are on the good way man, take care!!!
     
  12. parry

    parry Sing ing Sing

    Thanks Keoraf

    Your reply was pending Keoraf. I know you are busy these days and find only enough time to come here especially on weekends. :)
    Yes my song jana meri jana had a continuity which this one lacks.
    For guitar playing fellow members have advised some corrective steps and I am indebted.
    And well vocals!! I really dont know when I will get through with them. But I am surely trying.
    Thanks again.
     

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