Men's Rules (that women should know!)

Discussion in 'The ChitChat Lounge' started by lord_neo, Oct 28, 2005.

  1. lord_neo

    lord_neo Guest

    Women, learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present . . . . again!

    Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

    Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

    Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

    We don't remember dates. . . .Period!!

    Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

    Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!

    If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

    You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

    The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.

    ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

    We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

    If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

    Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

    BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

    Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know, it's like camping.

  2. Hardik

    Hardik .:.:.:BoRn TaLenT:.:.:. this a long time back....was fun reading again....:):)
  3. rocking_devil

    rocking_devil Banned

    cooooool!....seems like neo flirts a lot as well!:RollLol:
    i mean he knows to joke as well or was it a forward? :think:
  4. bjr

    bjr Lady of the Evening

    Of course its a forward....but a good one.
  5. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    guys r such losers.. :mad:
  6. rocking_devil

    rocking_devil Banned

    one who loses greatly, acheives greatly! :NoNo:
  7. bjr

    bjr Lady of the Evening

    but....but you love us this way :'(
  8. rocking_devil

    rocking_devil Banned

    may be thats why she is still single at 27 :RollLol: offense!
  9. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    @ RD

    24!!!!!! how many times shud i tell u...improve ur maths! dont u know its such a delicate matter wid girls..and u keep on increasing my age..Grrr :annoyed:
  10. shsnawada

    shsnawada Cyborgs & Pasta

    One out of thousands of well processed (i mean a LOT of brain) judgements..
    Talk about maturity.....archetypal levels of it...
  11. shsnawada

    shsnawada Cyborgs & Pasta

  12. rocking_devil

    rocking_devil Banned

    @vini - take it cool! keep replying and more people will tease!:p:
  13. vini

    vini Repeat Offender


    u shud be considered as mod u've nothing else better to do! :Laughing:

    anyways..lets not be offtopic!
  14. shsnawada

    shsnawada Cyborgs & Pasta

    Talk about "being an ass"

    Anyway the post in itself was a great example of hypocrisy......

    This is all that testerone can do??
  15. rocking_devil

    rocking_devil Banned

    here is a new definition oto gal's delicate matter! i thought it was the weight n sizes!:RollLol:
  16. jekyll

    jekyll Banned

    Nice One NEO ...
  17. Tanvi

    Tanvi New Member

    To all guys:
  18. it was pretty boring
    i just read the first few lines and the last line
  19. $cReWdR!veR

    $cReWdR!veR .:: Sweetheart ::. many rules for us....
    one rule for u...
    give all your money away to us...
  20. #iR@


    not bad...... lol

Share This Page