Hurry...tell me is this any good..

hey guys tell me how good or bad this is....wrote this for someone special.. : :
i told her that i thought abt her 24/7 and she asked me ....what do i think about....and i started wondering too...and came up with this....no title...

talking to you the other day...
u put in my mind a question
how do u figure out
in my daily equation....

since I've fallen in love with u..
ive not stopped thinking about u
I loose track of what I think..
but I know that I wanna know too....

I think about the look u give me..
with ur eyes so bright..
the one which tells me
that u love me alright...

and the look u give me
thru ur eyes pursed....
with that impish twinkle...
some mischief I know u surely nurse

or the times when am close
so close to u that it seems..
that with u my world begins...
and without u it looses its sheen..

so close that our noses touch..
and our eyelashes caress the other.
our breath we can feel
our lips die to pucker..

and still I look into those eyes
to find them looking back at me.
with the life that they drown me in
the ecstasy makes my heart bleed

I think abt those rare moments..
when we r close to each other..
with me getting intoxicated
by ur scent, ur aroma...
my knees buckle and in a trance, I totter....

and when I steal those touches ..
a hand here...a foot there, with my lips touching it
me caressing ur skin....oh, ur porcelain skin...
the adrenaline just makes my heart...
like a butterfly's wings flutter...

precious are those times when u & me
like two neophyte lovers...
just linger a look, or that knowing smile
always wary of the watching others...

the time we spend talking,
when u pamper me without intention...
treating me with utmost care
giving me the security, the reassurance

the kiss which was so perfect...
so perfect that it made perfection curl up in shame...
the kiss which made two storm clouds coalsce..
and applaud it with all their thunder..

the supple feel of ur lips on mine...
makes the blood rush to face
the passionate swirl of ur tonge
stirs emotions in me, which i gladly embrace

the feeling I get when I hold ur hand..
the warmth they just exude...
the cozy hug, the wonderful cuddle.
the lack of which questions my existence, my roots

the times am with myself
i peer into the time yet to come...
see a life i want to spend in those arms..
loving u each moment of my life, loving u each moment of your life...
and after that..until the end of time..

when i see those children,
yet unborn, in your eyes
u redefine what being a woman is..
always pouring oddles of love, without an ounce of malice....

the thought of us, makes me cry...
worry not, for these are tears
shed by a heart so overwhelmed by the thought
of being loved back by you...being in love with u..
thank you is all they say to you..sorrow isnt why they are here,

only if i could currette my mind
to know what more i ponder
but for now, i know this is more
than my madly in love heart can gather...

 

all i am gona say is ... I NEVER KNEW YOU WROTE SO GUD .. GUD JOB .. ITS NICE PERFECT FOR 'HER'

 

thx...skaw..
but people....please hurrry.....i need to know if i can give this to her..........

 

Tat was straight from the heart!

Yup, you can surely give this to her...

Keep it up!

REgards,
Zooom..!!

 

coollll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!wish i could write like that

 

Brilliant poem DrS, direct 'dil se' this poem, you can surely give it to her

 

thx peope...u knw what sucks.shes outta town and not gonna be here till tom eve..man that blows.. :badmood:

 

Wonderful poem.. but a soft whisper of "I L U" is enough

 

not for what i feel for this girl tried that never seem to get that content feeling.....that i finally conveyed what i wanted to say....

 

i think its realllllll good..... wud also prove to be nice lyrix for a soft song............

 

Well, straight from the heart and directly aiming at the point... no fancy beating around the bush...

 

wow , awesome work dude , u gonna rock her out of her chair maen , keep it up ,...

 

that was really nice, she's gonna get a pleasant surprise when she gets back...

 

You'll knock her socks off(excuse the expression)

 

i ve heard that for the 1st time as far as love is concerned , to knock someones socks off , lol

 

Wrong usage, pardon me But whatever, as long as it gets the meaning across

 

@disturbed.....lol
gave it to her....she liked it time: :band:

 

wooo hoooo .... all dis time i stood in stress, hoping she'd like ur poem .. n she did ... phew... tell her .. thank you for liking it .. if she didn't like it then all my fake applaud wuldve been of no use (it suked man << kiddin )

 

She liked it peeps!!! hip hip hooray!!!! so any replies from her man....what's the deal now...bra, details, c'mon

 

way to go doc , no wonder u r all lil pup fluffy ,....