Dengerous Viruses

Discussion in 'The ChitChat Lounge' started by 6string_addict, May 11, 2005.

  1. 6string_addict

    6string_addict * Addicted Guitarist * <img src="https://www.india

    Dengerous Indian Viruses
    ********************
    The following is the list of some new viruses going round in India.
    Better beware of them.

    P.V. Narasimha Rao Virus:
    First of all, this virus reduces the CPU speed to 66Hz. Before
    executing any instruction, it deleberates over it a number of times
    and finally does nothing.

    V.P. Singh Virus:
    This virus reserves a quota for each instruction, and executes them
    only according to the quota. Needless to say, the least used
    instructions have a higher quota than the more used instructions.
    This virus is also known as social justice virus.

    Sukh Ram Virus:
    This virus first swallows 10% of the bits in each instruction and
    then executes them.

    Maneka Gandhi Virus:
    This is a green virus. It executes only those programmes that were
    written by vegetarians or animals.

    L.K. Advani Virus:
    This virus pops up every now and then, and the only way you can
    continue working is by typing Jai Shri Ram 108 times.

    K.P.S. Gill Virus:
    Only ladies need to worry about this virus.Every now and then the
    users get a whack, you know where.

    Phoolan Devi Virus:
    This virus hijacks all high priority processes and generates page
    faults for them. At times, this virus may also celebrate the CPU*s
    birthday.

    Deve Gowda Virus:
    The main characterestic of this virus is that it tries to schedule all
    the processes at the same time. This virus services all the request
    for resources,and allocates them irrespective of whether they are
    available or not.

    Jayalalitha Virus:
    This actually is a family of viruses. Each member of this virus
    family grab as much of hard disk space as possible,while the main virus is
    totally unaware of it. When everything stops working,this virus
    blames the user for the whole chaos.

    I.K.Gujral Virus:
    Before executing any instruction, this virus calls tries to get the
    approval of 18 other viruses and most of the time, one of the viruses
    blocks the instruction. So Gujral virus most of the time does not
    execute anything. While it is not doing anything, as it is always,
    this virus connects to the Internet and keeps sending data to all
    major/minor countries in the World except India w/o receiving the
    replies.

    Veerappan virus:
    This virus plays hide and seek. it captures some resources and
    releases them after sometime. it sometimes seems to be eradicated but
    suddenly reappears.
    Laloo Yadav virus:
    A dangerous virus, gulps all the resources as well as it corrupts the
    data. If you try to use scanner, During hibernation,it will rename
    its signature with another deadly virus of the same family. This virus
    takes help from other viruses to avoid scanning.

    Mulayam Virus:
    Whatever way, it will try to grab resources of the system, it's only
    task is to abort BJP processes. this virus hangs the system by
    sending conflicting signals to different hardware units.

    Sonia Gandhi Virus:
    Once a part of most deadly virus family of the world. No scanner can
    detect now, how much damage it can cause to the system, but people
    use Bofors scanner for temporary protection.

    Kashi-Maya Virus:
    It's also called the Dalit virus, it destabilizes the co-ordination
    amongst different resources, It controls & steps the low priority
    resources from functioning. Lot of scanners available now to kill it.
    Other viruses are thriving by splitting this virus.

    :rock: :rock: :rock:
     
  2. Addy Pant

    Addy Pant Highway Star

    Oh man!! Where do you get all these funny jokes??
     
  3. 6string_addict

    6string_addict * Addicted Guitarist * <img src="https://www.india

    :p: :p: :p:
     
  4. thecoolone

    thecoolone Judas Priest My Guide

    nice one 6 string .... liked the I.K gujral virus the most
     

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