Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by i'm_not_neo, Dec 22, 2006.

  1. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    Okay once you're through reading it I'm pretty sure its a typical poem but yeah
    it was one of the first few poems I really liked making..Yeah its a poem though it has a rap-ish feeling to it..


    You're walking down a street
    that seems to go downhill
    You laugh at the irony
    Coz so is your life
    You're kicking cans,cursing yourself
    blaming everyone,
    even your destiny.

    So you think you've seen it all
    been through it all
    when will you wake up
    to see your troubles are
    ever so small.

    You've been blinded by anger
    by frustration,desperation
    you're pointing fingers
    but you know you are the
    architect of your annihiliation.

    So turn around and walk that incline
    laugh at the irony
    Coz so will your life.
    If you want to be great
    it ain't gonna happen
    Unless you sweat
    You have to give it all
    to be the best.

    Stop the bickering
    renounce yourself
    this life is about you
    Even in your failure
    and your success.

    If you think you've been cornered
    thats life's way of telling you
    "Life ain't all candy,
    Eat or be devoured."

    Its your life,
    So turn your ship around
    break free from the shackles of defeat
    And never be afraid
    Of going downhill.
    vini likes this.
  2. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    this is good the exact word will be...fair
    i onse wrote The Baba

    Death came close and he laughed on her
    cause he knew he had, what all was to be done
    she was terrified to notice that the man had followers
    exited to follow and preparing for the run ...

    leave it .... u culd have got more out of the same thought i.e the paradox.
  3. #iR@


    good work man... must say ur poems r definitly somethuing i enjoy reading! :) keep em commin..
  4. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    very nice..!! title my opinion overall there is a positive tone so the title is becoming misleading..u can think of sumthin else..thats just a suggestion! :) im impressed!

    so very true lines :-
  5. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    @madhuresh..well thank you..and yeah I got your point.

    @#ira...well thank you..good to know that.

    @vini..thanks for the reps again...about the "cornered" thing, well the
    poem was supposed to actually be based on "when you're cornered" kinda thats where I got the title from...Eventhough "when you're
    cornered" would be more appropriate, it would be too lenghty and too

    And reason 2 would be:
    If you think you've been CORNERED
    thats life's way of telling you
    "Life ain't all candy,
    Eat or be devoured."

    that was my favourite part of the poem.

    Again reps = thanx.
  6. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    right boss..point taken!
  7. i'm_not_neo

    i'm_not_neo el valor máximo absoluto

    Yeah, i haven't really overcome my 10th std. habit of writing lengthy answers.

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