Computer gender

Discussion in 'Funny Emails, Jokes, SMS's, Videos' started by arniehawk, Mar 16, 2012.

  1. arniehawk

    arniehawk New Member

    As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., "Steady as shegoes" or "She's listing to starboard, Captain!")
    Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should also be referred to as being female.
    Their reasons for drawing this conclusion follow:
    Five reasons to believe computers are female:
    1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
    2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
    3. The message "Bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "Ifyou don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you."
    4. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
    5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending halfyour paycheck on accessories for it.
    However, another group of computer scientists, (all female) think that computers should be referred to as if they were male. Their reasons follow:
    Five reasons to believe computers are male:
    1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
    2. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
    3. As soon as you commit to one you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have obtained a better model.
    4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
    5. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night
  2. rickkkyrich

    rickkkyrich Guest

    To know the actual gender try this:
    1. Open your notepad
    2. Type or copy paste:
    CreateObject(“SAPI.SpVoice”).Speak”Who am I” (if you copy+paste the code, replace quotes by actual quotes on your keyboard)
    3. Save as whoami.vbs
    4. Run the file.

    If you hear a male voice, you have a boy if woman’s, it’s a girl.
  3. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    The joke was good, but the latter comment was super-good!
    I dunno if all IT-pros know this, they might, but its certainly new to people like me. You can change settings for male or female voice, isn't it?
  4. guitarplayer729

    guitarplayer729 New Member

    the male is the microsoft sam
    and the girl comes in windows7(although it can be changed)
  5. alpha1

    alpha1 I BLUES!

    CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"Who am I"

    Here ... ppl can copy paste this directly, instead of typing over the inverted quotes.
  6. horsesmouth

    horsesmouth Active Member

    Since ships were referred, our professors gave explanations too:
    1. They keep their bottoms covered
    2. Men are always over her.
    3. They need a fortune to keep going.
    4. They are unpredictable and non-understandable.
    5. They have huge sterns (dialogue from titanic).

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