-Building Walls-

Discussion in 'Poetry and Lyrics Forum' started by BubblyMartini, Apr 26, 2006.

  1. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM

    -Building Walls-

    People build high walls
    secluding their feelings isloating their hearts
    signs of no trespassing show no rue
    their face shows what it fails to feel
    stirring their heart livid they make it reel
    distracting the scowling world with their smile
    not a bit does it seem vile
    tipsy with their hazy thoughts
    dusky past for them everlasts
    cracking down that wall is forbidden for them
    lettting someone in would be a bidding for them
    lo the invisibile curtains fall down again
    wrapped in them lost in them
    they embrace their self-inflicted loneliness again
    letting off would only be if they let someone in
    break those walls and let a new life begin
    its time to bring them out from the cage they built
    set free their encumbered reams of undue guilt
    before it tears them down
    bring down their castle
    and throw away their crown


    Good or Bad..or horribly ugly
    Do gimme your honest comments..

    i've stopped answering questions related to my poems
    so i'l leave it to your imagination as to what the poem depicts

    Thanks for reading
  2. zoomingrocket

    zoomingrocket TeChNiCaL AdMiNiStRaToR

    Powerful Lines...
    More of a Prose.. but it has a strong message..
    Keep it up...

  3. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    Pata nahi isse kyaa kahen, accha kahen ya bura kahen, kisi ne maan se kheer bana ke bhji hai, par taste aisa jise Davaa kaheen

    ....aisa kaun mil gaya app ko jisne ye likhne ko majboor kiya...haha just a unconfidant quriosity
  4. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM

    Thanks dear..
    and err...well... yh, it does seem like prose..i never tried to make it better:eek::

    Shukriya..bus aur kuch nahi kahugi..;)
  5. walk_alone

    walk_alone **~~| An Atheist |~~**

    Indeed a very deeply thought poem.

    kudos to you.
  6. notty_lad

    notty_lad sudo undress

    Horribly Ugly ..

    Coz It makes me feel so Jealous .. Damn thats a great theme .. n How fantastically n Beautifully expressed .. :nw: .. BUBBLY rocks !!! YaaaY !!!

    By the Way U're so powerful in Vocabulary n Grammar .. not to mention expression .. have u done somethin professional in English .. some study or somethin ?? Jz outta curiosity .. :)

    @Pepsi Tv - The BUBBLY channel. All rights reserved.
  7. vini

    vini Repeat Offender

    hmm..food for thought

    good one there
  8. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM


    @BUBBLY channel :annoyed: u think i wont notice if you put it in small text

    and about the Powerful in vocab and grammer
    i actually fumble for words sometimes...*cough*
    so Dont talk about Proffesionalism in English
    atleast academically speaking ;)

    Thanks for the comments
    appreciate you paying a visit to the poetry forum..

    @Vini- Thanks! :)
  9. notty_lad

    notty_lad sudo undress

    Woah boy .. So they teach Diplomacy in talking too in yo academy .. So smoothly U ignored to answer muh question ;; ) .. n I so well know the meanin of that *cough* :grin:

    Some people jz compel me to come in here with their "unprofessional" words .. ;)
  10. guitarangela

    guitarangela gran'ma

    nice poem, bubbbly..i wudnt call it a poem exactly...as zoom said, more of a prose....Though, I loved it....contains a VERY VERY strong message......<3....

    nice usage of vocabulary too....:)
    reps to u, bubbly didi;)
  11. amit82cse

    amit82cse Silent observeR

    Everyone is appreciating what is clearly visible outside..I am get used to that in your poems..So now I look for something inside you that is not so visible...

    their face shows what it fails to feel

    I dont know whether you have come up with this line *just like that* or *is it really well thought*. In either case I love its power.

    You are awesome (give me some more words from your vocab to appreciate you:p: )
  12. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM


    Thanks Amit

    their face shows what it fails to feel

    the line is the crux..i wont explain what it meant, but you sure have hit the right note..
    Thanks again, its nice to hear comments from a poet

  13. madhuresh

    madhuresh madhuresh

    so u didnt tell, waht u saw inside bubbly ? ;)
  14. Amanush...

    Amanush... Tanha Rahi...!

    Building walls around one's own secrecy is not so bad as idea...!

    Very nice poetry, indeed !


  15. nimisha

    nimisha .:Forum Leader:.

    hmmm.. good one..
  16. BubblyMartini

    BubblyMartini !!!HAWM

    @Amanush- its always nice hearing your views..thanks:)
    @Nimisha- thanks..

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