Ad Infinitum

Scared for my life
Running through the streets
Buildings crumbling
The ground shaking beneath my feet

Running out of breath now
A sudden flash of light
I can feel the excruciating heat
I fall, to get up, I fight

A dead limb and burnt skin
I pull myself forward with my arms
Away from the falling debris
Trying to get away from the way of harm

But what lies ahead
No better than what's behind
Another flash of light and I faint
I wake up to find

It was all a nightmare
Frighteningly real though
I slowly walk to the window
And open it to feel the wind blow

And as I leave my home for work
A loud explosion I hear
I look around to see my world fall apart
I feel it again, the fear

Again I run as fast as I can
Flashes of light and unbearable heat I feel
To the ground, again I fall
And this time too, it feels real

And once again I faint
And wake up in my room
But when I leave my home
I can see my own doom

Stuck for eternity
In this recursive dream
The worst part is I'm aware of it all
And all I can really do, is scream

 

Is it too long?

 

naa its not too long...
afte ur earlier poem...reading this second crap...
n again i felt like nice crap..lol...

it starts excellently....n the concept of recursive dream is too good...
last two stanzas seems ending the poem abruptly... u cud have streched it more..
all in all...good job..!

 

really gud, loopyfruit... read ur otha poem aswell, tht ws kl,
i think this 1 is betta, although as nimisha sed, the endin does com kinda abruptly... still gud tho
well done

 

@Nimisha- Thanks! and u can cut the "crap" crap now, hardly funny anymore. I have my friend to thank for the concept, but the rest is all me Thanks again

@mr singh- Thanks a lot man, lol, ur id somehow seems to command respect

 

Another gud one from you....but somehow ends in a sadistic tone...nthng wrong with that.....i think you can add another stanze at end.

 

Even I was thinking of adding another stanza.. 9 stanzas dont look too good :S
10 would be better........

 

Well Loopy is not abt the count but the flow of expression.....sometimes u can express "a world" in one stanza and sometimes even a dozen is not enough.

 

True.. I'm just not in the right frame of mind to make sense right now.
So will write later hopefully.

 

Reminds me of somebody, dont know whom :think:


Nice poem btw... Youre pretty damn excellent for a n00b

 

Hey!!
its good you posted your poem..and not referred to as crap..never do that!!!
how old is this one?

the presentation is nice..
since the sujbject himself seems confused you have done justice in reflecting that in the poem
potrayal of some emotions is quite hard
people may have all the concepts and all the ideas,but it sure is hard to put it paper..
wont ask you if this is inspired by real incidents and dont even tell me that
what i perceive is a recurring emotion cycle the person follows.. and that lasts forever ie. Ad infinitum- (i also liked the title btw)

Good job!

PS- whats with your username?

 

Ha ............. nicely captured.
Infact I used to think a lot about these Recursive dreams?

What are they called? Lucid Dreams?
Some one help me with the correct term.

 

@shsnawada- Thank you... I had to actually copy-paste your ID, it's so confusing!
So, you mean to say "n00b"s cant write like that?

 

Thank you Bubbly, I had been waiting for your reply
I like how you read "into" the poem!
And my user name, LOL, well, I was talking about "Fruity Loops" which is a software to a friend while registering... so, now you know
This one's new! Wrote it today only

 

Thanks, I don't know what they're actually called, which is why I used the term "recursive"!

 

Well, yeah. The only first timer that i've seen which kicks ass was disturbed's poem.

ps: Dont worry, you'll get used to my username. Just takes time. :beer:

 

^^ I liked that ...... nicely written dude.........

 

Well, I'm a first timer only on IGT. In reality I write a lot and have been writing for a while.

Thanks again

 

Thank you very much!

 

^ *sings I lovey loopy and dances *