Every day and minute seems to be stretching more than always With many mixed feelings, it becomes difficult to relax and be normal.
The night before the results were to be out was a little stressful. So much was hinging on these results. They were going to decide everything for me. Everything! Where I was going to study, who my friends were going to be, what job I was going to get, who I was going to marry, whether I could look my father in the eye and tell him I was replacing him as the alpha male in the house. So much depended on tonight and I knew it was going to be my night. Tonight was the night I was going to tell him about the girl I loved. Tonight was the night I was going to tell the girl I loved that she was the girl I loved. Tonight I would look down upon the rest of the world. The best thing was that this night was it. After this, life was going to be a breeze. I was going to get into a great college, land a great job, earn lots of money and live comfortably. There’d be lots of opportunities to have the fun I missed out on these least two years. But what if it wasn’t my night? Could I bear to see disappointment wrought in my mother’s eyes as she pushed away the packet of ladoos she had been planning to distribute? Could I bear to see my friends go away to better places and lead better lives? Could I bear to be discussed behind my back in hushed whispers and turn around only to see them stare back in mock sympathy? What would come next? Would I have to start all over? Would I be able to make new friends? Who wanted to be friends with a failure anyway? What about the girl of my dreams? Would she understand that I was still the same person? Was I even going to remain the same person? Tonight, everything was going to change one way or the other. I was going to be a hero or slink away hoping to remain unnoticed. I was going to die. I had three hours left to savour the life I’ve known. Three hours to try and reflect on the last 18 years and the culmination of what I had been working towards. What if I didn’t want it to change? Did I have a choice? I don’t want to change. The only way is to freeze myself in this moment forever. I will. Prologue: Class 10: beta, these are board exams. It’s time to get serious. If you work hard now, you will be able to enjoy life later. 2 years later, Class 12: beta, these exams shape your future. Based on the marks you get in them, your whole future is decided. Work hard for this. Once you get into a good college, your life is set and the fun starts. 1 year later, College: beta, this is where you compete to get your first good salary. Once you have a good job, it’s all downhill from there. 4 years later, Job: You’ve had 21 years of fun. Now you need to start getting serious. You didn’t think we were just going to give away the money to you? But…but…I had 85% in class 10!
I never cared about it. Which really irked my parents. So when I tried reasoning with them once - they got angry. (the next day they also wanted me to crowd over to the school notice board just to get hold of "Boards" result - which would anyway come to my house in 15 days time) And I decided that adults are just grown up in physical size, but mentally they can be like children. BJR: "best seller piece". Are you trying something like that moron Chetan Bhagat? (of course much better than him)
my results just came out recently.. on 28th ... and damn it 27th was the longest night of my life. as yet : my parents weren't as tensed somehow... it was me who spent all night tossing and turning and the next morning hopping around the house. i spent the whole night thinking that i am going to fail ... and then suddenly " yaar itne bure bhi nahi gye the..i won't fail..sleep" and then again.. " what if i do!" but it did not go thattt bad
you could wait for 15 days knowing that the results were out? :O wow...some patience you have!! p.s. i hate chetan bhagat..this ( bjr's piece was far far better than him..)
Haha, nooo this was my "Noir". I recently downloaded and played LA Noire and that has been stuck in my head so I visualized the whole scene in Noir and wrote it down (or you could read it in a Max Payne voice). It's meant to mock the style (and the results, I guess). You're right...now that you said it, it does seem to read like something Chetan Bhagat would write. At least I know now when (note that I say when and not if) I become a writer, I will sell if people still read by then. Also, Nandy what exams were these and how much did you get? and also in Chetan Bhagat's defense, I'm sure he'd do better if he just had to write 10 lines. Maybe then he'd be pretentious and be Chuck Lorre instead.
i have heard about this "noire" somewhere.. but i am not able to recall where.. :\ or maybe something else. i was learning french.. and they call black color "noire" ...umm maybe..! this is frustrating..not avle to recall something.. :\ they were my 12th standard board exams..i scored..80% and personally i don't like Chetan Bhagat because he solely focuses on one particular type of readers..
Point is not about patience. The point is about mindless tension / worrying / fretting. Results are not gonna change whether I pray to god or not, whether I get tense the night before or not, whether I go and push everyone away and see my score the first in the school. Yes, slight nervousness is obvious prior to the results, but that goes away once you get busy with better things in life (who doesn't have?). And that's why I never sat down to wait for results.
HAHAHA. It was mighty good though. It would've sounded better with the Cockney brit accent ... Reminded me somehow of the Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
I usually already know what my result is going to be. So it is not much nervousness. If i know it is good i make sure to exploit the pre result anxiety of my parents to get them to buy me stuff they would never agree to in a clear state of mind.
