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Thread: The Teardrop

  1. #1
    Poison... is offline Newbie
    Join Date
    Oct 2009

    The Teardrop

    The teardrop; it sprayed out a rainbow from within.
    It echoed a much deeper pain.
    Below the eye it hung, quivering.

    It held nothing as it rolled down the cheek
    Ominously dragging the mascara with it;
    Not wanting to be alone.

    Chilling jaws of the wind blew it away,
    Freezing it before it fell any lower.

    I caught your eye and we smiled;
    The agony shattered like the tear that splattered on the ground.

  2. #2
    ghost_blogger is offline Newbie
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Mumbai, India
    That's really good. It's quite vivid and imaginative.
    Good going..

  3. #3
    bjr's Avatar
    bjr is offline Lady of the Evening
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    Apr 2005
    hobs crk
    I think this is really well-written. You've created a very real image in my head with your words. Does spraying out a rainbow allude to a ray of light falling on the tear?
    And surely youll buy your pint cup !
    and surely Ill buy mine !
    And we'll take a cup o kindness yet,
    for auld lang syne.

  4. #4
    Poison... is offline Newbie
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Yes. It exactly indicates that.
    Also, a rainbow is something that is related to happiness. So it was a bit ironic too.

  5. #5
    horsesmouth's Avatar
    horsesmouth is offline IGTIAN
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    oh, I thought by rainbow you meant many sorrows effusing out.

    Its very good, vivid, as bjr said!.
    I've hung around and I've taken my time,
    I've beat the dust and kissed the grime;
    Stand I shall, not for you though,
    Its just me now, wherever I may go.



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