burnt expectations..

i set fire to the stage
i ignite the wistful crowds
i burn off the age
ain't no care about any shrouds..
they cheered me on
screaming " one more song "
i force a smile and i go on again
get down on my knees but shouting still, i fight this pain
i sway and they sway with me as i get down all i hear is my name
i search and research the crowd
people creating a frenzy on meeting my lingering gaze
ow! the speakers blaring so loud
but my eyes don' rest and alas they're covered in a misty haze..
i don' see him out there
but my heart goes on still with a silent prayer
disappointed , i shred another solo, moving my fingers in a burning frenzy
my heart cries out loud .. and i scream louder..none then i can see
i burn my fingers against my guitar
the crowd screams and howls..i sweat it all out.my mind afar
" you are no good" .. "
" oh come on..get rid of that black hood"
" i have no time to listen crap..its better if you study just as you should"
" yeah right..ill come..ill see you perform..i have some feelings too.im no wood.."
i can't take it anymore..and i throw it away
the crowd howls louder..i stop.. i refuse to play
they try and stop me but the look in those burning eyes stops them far from my way
i splash cold the freezing water on my burning face
its red with fury.." what's with me? " .. i am the ace
i walk back home
away from madness..all alone
i knock and hear no answer
i barge in
there he is..still busy
taking no notice of virtues or sins
lying on the cot
i think to myself, did i ask for a lot?
he should've come, he was my brother
but oh yes..he's busy as hell..he has others
tears feel warm against my freshly washed hot face
i try and pass another night in this god damned place
i pick up my guitar
play some more
he won't notice
he won't care
i play loud..i beat the strings
he knocks..i don' care
he comes in and i smile
as if he has some angel wings
he stands there and i look up
he screams " care to put it down or just the fu** up"
right..here goes another thud over it is like every night
i sleep on it yet again...fighting tears , fighting plight..

silent prayer? Shredding solos? What, emo metal? Btw it looked real(was it?), going by the words, I'd call it intense and gripping, just like a good story... Poetry-wise, good.

Originally Posted by horsesmouth

silent prayer? Shredding solos? What, emo metal? Btw it looked real(was it?), going by the words, I'd call it intense and gripping, just like a good story... Poetry-wise, good.

haha.. umm.. kind of real.. :-)
and thank you .. :-)

p.s. no more replies? :( whyyyyy is this forum becoming sooo dead.!?! o.O

i dont knw what to say.. this poem is like a short story in phrases ... thier is noting unsaid ..u can do better :P

Originally Posted by monica_decosta

i dont knw what to say.. this poem is like a short story in phrases ... thier is noting unsaid ..u can do better :P

umm ... but i dunno why ..i mean..whats wrong in leaving nothing unsaid..i likeee blunt poetry..sometimes.. ^_^

^ ... blunt poetry (this word is a gold mine even google couldnt find it) :P.... when u write just ever thing the number of strings that ur reader can attch with get reduced .. poetry isi aspect main prose se different hai .. poetry is like women she just dosent says what she is saying lol :P

Originally Posted by monica_decosta

^ ... blunt poetry (this word is a gold mine even google couldnt find it) :P.... when u write just ever thing the number of strings that ur reader can attch with get reduced .. poetry isi aspect main prose se different hai .. poetry is like women she just dosent says what she is saying lol :P

hehe ... that was the greatest compliment.. i am brighter than google..eeee.. ^_^ hahaha..kiddin..
i liked the woman example.. seriously..
h m m .. !

I read it in the voice of Bruce Dickinson .. I donno why but it gave me such a feel.. Great lines, i might borrow them..

Originally Posted by rickkkyrich

I read it in the voice of Bruce Dickinson .. I donno why but it gave me such a feel.. Great lines, i might borrow them..

ha!
thanks a lot..!
and borrow them..umm for a song??? ;D