MNA Report – Jan 2006
NJ citizen sues Metallica and the Music Publishers Association of USA
Giving them an unexpected taste of their own medicine, a New Jersey youngster plans to sue legendary metal band Metallica and the Music Publishers Association of USA, according to trusted news sources. Apparently it all began when the man began to fart uncontrollably – and they sounded like a popular Metallica song.
The decidedly anal Music Publishers Association of USA (MPA) swung into the act and were seriously contemplating busting his ass – literally – on charges of “unlicensed performance”. Not to be bogged down, the man applied to Metallica for a performance license but was promptly refused. According to a Metallica spokesman the band did not want to "sound like shit – at least not officially."
This led the dismayed youth to move the court for what he believes is his birthright – the freedom to fart. Ironically he is – or used to be – one of Metallica's most ardent fans. It pained him to take this drastic step, he moaned, "the last thing I wanted to do was raise a stink about my favorite musicians."
© 2006 Masala News Agency